memories are meant to be kept, right?
memories, are supposed to bring good influences, right?
a year of effort to overcome and go on, failed.
is it because there's no one to show me the proof?
or is it because God has another reason?
or is it because the path is indeed meant to be walked alone with Him?
please guide me Lord, you are the only true friend i have left...
October 23, 2012
still...Tiffany!
Posted in Music
MUSIC is still one of the best companion! lets clear the blues!
New covers from Tiffany! hasn't been updating myself for almost a month. =)
New covers from Tiffany! hasn't been updating myself for almost a month. =)
I Knew You Were Trouble - Taylor Swift - Tiffany Alvord Cover
My Heart Is - Tiffany Alvord
The Breakdown - Tiffany Alvord
We are Never Ever Getting Back Together - Taylor Swift - Tiffany Alvord Cover
October 22, 2012
本性
Posted in Just Daily Life, Love
人的本性真的无法改吗？
用了这么多年的时间，结果还是倒回同样一个膜。
不要让她知道的决定果然没错，结果搞得自己这么伤感。
一而再，再而三地主动先踏出那步了，结果还是一样。
现在的她，就是小学中学的她。
环境，原来可以有这么大的威力，三年的友谊，就可以把七八年的友情感情踢得远远的。
完全无言以对，唯有佩服。。。
要成为朋友？不是这样的。客套话省了吧！
不想说谢谢就别说，没诚心的谢谢，不要对我说。
我要的是诚恳的朋友，很生疏的朋友至少也可以很热情地打招呼，你的态度，免了。
用了这么多年的时间，结果还是倒回同样一个膜。
不要让她知道的决定果然没错，结果搞得自己这么伤感。
一而再，再而三地主动先踏出那步了，结果还是一样。
现在的她，就是小学中学的她。
环境，原来可以有这么大的威力，三年的友谊，就可以把七八年的友情感情踢得远远的。
完全无言以对，唯有佩服。。。
要成为朋友？不是这样的。客套话省了吧！
不想说谢谢就别说，没诚心的谢谢，不要对我说。
我要的是诚恳的朋友，很生疏的朋友至少也可以很热情地打招呼，你的态度，免了。
Monday BLUE?
Posted in Just Daily Life
Having a cup of coffee, sitting back, relax, online browsing my favourites...ah...such an indulgence...although it's just for a few hours...the appreciation counts...and the best part is I don't feel any monday blues! haha...although will need to rush for work after touching Johor ground...gonna miss Kuching so so much...such a fun and lovely night meeting old school friends last nite...worth the ticket back! =)
October 20, 2012
KUCHING!!!
Posted in Just Daily Life
so excited to go back tomorrow...too bad have to rush back on Mon for work...haiz...when I have family in future it might be even harder to go back for a few days...hopefully I manage to get my professional license in these few years time and manage to go back to my hometown! the place I love the most and wish to stay the most!
Although going back Kuching may spark lots of memories of her...I believe I can also create new memories with my friends and family back there...couple love shall not be one of my main life priority anymore until I meet someone whom is able to change my thinking and drive me to overcome the phobia...until then...live life to the fullest! yeah! =)
October 17, 2012
the 7 little bears...
Posted in Just Daily Life
Wish her all the best and May she meet her real prince soon...many thanks to sis sa for keeping this secret (thou she wont have any reaction anyway knowing the truth)...haha =D
so what should I do with her now? throw? keep? she's so adorable...but keeping her doesnt bring any gd...haiz...
October 16, 2012
GOD is so real!
Posted in Daily Inspirations, Just Daily Life
GOD is always around, this is so true!...
I was quite anxious about the site meeting that I need to chair myself without my supervisor. I've just worked for two months plus and how possibly could I handle all those weird construction terms and issues that I might not even heard of?...and there it was this morning receiving the email stating the postpone of meeting, so my supervisor will be available at that time and will be going with me. lol...I guess God knows that I'm not prepared to handle that yet so I have a bit more time to learn and catch up, and I know I need to work harder! Now is the time to focus in work and my first target! This field is not pretty and prospect-full just as I expected and it is really not easy to become an architect that really build a 'home'land, not just houses. I do not have the social and financial background to do a lot of things as what others can. What I can do is just to keep learning and trying, making mistakes and making improvements. I hope this is the right thing to do. Time passes fast and I might not have much time to spend.
SPACES. SENSES. SOCIAL. This might just be a simple motto, but it bears all my aspiration of what to do as an architect. Design is not just about aesthetic, but what I always heard of is "wow! this building is so beautiful!""..."wow! this is so special!"..."wow! this building is so majestic! so grand!" Policies in Malaysia are slowly changing architects into exterior packaging and submission person in charge, this is not healthy. The whole process of building up an area for public is separated into many bits and pieces and there's no unity to bring up the quality of livelihood. When 'divide and rule' occurs, things tend to get messed up as different people always has different opinions. So how do we unite the idea of building a land truly suitable for the growth and health of mankind's body and soul? The answer is always a question mark, left unsolved...
This is just the first target, the hardest to achieve, let's go little ant! Keep yourself up and going! Don't let anything drag you down!
I was quite anxious about the site meeting that I need to chair myself without my supervisor. I've just worked for two months plus and how possibly could I handle all those weird construction terms and issues that I might not even heard of?...and there it was this morning receiving the email stating the postpone of meeting, so my supervisor will be available at that time and will be going with me. lol...I guess God knows that I'm not prepared to handle that yet so I have a bit more time to learn and catch up, and I know I need to work harder! Now is the time to focus in work and my first target! This field is not pretty and prospect-full just as I expected and it is really not easy to become an architect that really build a 'home'land, not just houses. I do not have the social and financial background to do a lot of things as what others can. What I can do is just to keep learning and trying, making mistakes and making improvements. I hope this is the right thing to do. Time passes fast and I might not have much time to spend.
SPACES. SENSES. SOCIAL. This might just be a simple motto, but it bears all my aspiration of what to do as an architect. Design is not just about aesthetic, but what I always heard of is "wow! this building is so beautiful!""..."wow! this is so special!"..."wow! this building is so majestic! so grand!" Policies in Malaysia are slowly changing architects into exterior packaging and submission person in charge, this is not healthy. The whole process of building up an area for public is separated into many bits and pieces and there's no unity to bring up the quality of livelihood. When 'divide and rule' occurs, things tend to get messed up as different people always has different opinions. So how do we unite the idea of building a land truly suitable for the growth and health of mankind's body and soul? The answer is always a question mark, left unsolved...
This is just the first target, the hardest to achieve, let's go little ant! Keep yourself up and going! Don't let anything drag you down!
October 15, 2012
12.10.14
Posted in Just Daily Life
哇！好累的一天！
不过一句话，很喜乐的一天。
虽然我不是什么优秀生，也不是什么毕业大明星有很多朋友很多礼物，
但开心是我可以和全家人一起渡过，一起拍全家福。
家，始终还是我永远的归属。但愿我的家继续蒙神祝福！
感恩有这个家，让我可以长大，可以学习，可以有今天的一切！
更感恩有神的带领，五年来的确风风雨雨，经历生活酸甜苦辣，让我学习了很多人性，神性。
人的伟大，关怀，恶毒，无情，等。
神的恩典，引领，保护，祝福，等。
感激神，家人，曾经深爱的佩诗，教会众弟兄姐妹，系友等。
你们让我的五年生涯活得多姿多彩，有哭有笑，这才是所谓的 ‘生活’。
今天的秘密任务也算成功，哈哈！
听说她收到那礼物是很开心很喜欢，总算可以彻底了了这心结。
就当作是我对她最后的祝福吧，往后的日子就要下决心专心目标了吧！
虽然寂寞，虽然渴望，但这一切都不足以让我可以再次相信感情。
感情的脆弱，感情的迅变，感情的谎言，无论你多么努力，也不一定有成果。
人说女人要安全感，
有了安全感又要幽默感，
有了幽默感又要陪伴感，
有了陪伴感又要。。。又要。。。
你有某样不足，就得预备好她离开的心。
潇洒地离开，也潇洒地把你当透明，太恐怖了。。。
年岁，
与其浪费在无保障的感情事上，
倒不如用在更有用处的地方。
寂寞，就学习克服吧！
不过一句话，很喜乐的一天。
虽然我不是什么优秀生，也不是什么毕业大明星有很多朋友很多礼物，
但开心是我可以和全家人一起渡过，一起拍全家福。
家，始终还是我永远的归属。但愿我的家继续蒙神祝福！
感恩有这个家，让我可以长大，可以学习，可以有今天的一切！
更感恩有神的带领，五年来的确风风雨雨，经历生活酸甜苦辣，让我学习了很多人性，神性。
人的伟大，关怀，恶毒，无情，等。
神的恩典，引领，保护，祝福，等。
感激神，家人，曾经深爱的佩诗，教会众弟兄姐妹，系友等。
你们让我的五年生涯活得多姿多彩，有哭有笑，这才是所谓的 ‘生活’。
今天的秘密任务也算成功，哈哈！
听说她收到那礼物是很开心很喜欢，总算可以彻底了了这心结。
就当作是我对她最后的祝福吧，往后的日子就要下决心专心目标了吧！
虽然寂寞，虽然渴望，但这一切都不足以让我可以再次相信感情。
感情的脆弱，感情的迅变，感情的谎言，无论你多么努力，也不一定有成果。
人说女人要安全感，
有了安全感又要幽默感，
有了幽默感又要陪伴感，
有了陪伴感又要。。。又要。。。
你有某样不足，就得预备好她离开的心。
潇洒地离开，也潇洒地把你当透明，太恐怖了。。。
年岁，
与其浪费在无保障的感情事上，
倒不如用在更有用处的地方。
寂寞，就学习克服吧！
October 13, 2012
我毕业了！
Posted in Just Daily Life
明天！就是我辛苦了五年的毕业典礼！
之前的确是没什么感觉，但今天开始觉得紧张了。。。
虽然不晓得该紧张什么，心里就不由得紧张的侵袭。
有时会期待很多人来祝贺我送我礼物，但有时又希望简简单单默默渡过就是了。
或许也是因为期望看到她收到我的礼物会开心吧。。。
虽然她不会知道是我送的，或说她无需知道是我送的。
重要的是她明天可以开心漂亮！自己心里欣慰就足够了。。。
总而言之，结果如何就看明天吧！哈哈！
穿上那红袍，代表着自己是时候成熟了，是时候学习面对自己所做的一切决定了。
在这里先祝贺自己 “恭喜我毕业了！”
嘻嘻 =)
之前的确是没什么感觉，但今天开始觉得紧张了。。。
虽然不晓得该紧张什么，心里就不由得紧张的侵袭。
有时会期待很多人来祝贺我送我礼物，但有时又希望简简单单默默渡过就是了。
或许也是因为期望看到她收到我的礼物会开心吧。。。
虽然她不会知道是我送的，或说她无需知道是我送的。
重要的是她明天可以开心漂亮！自己心里欣慰就足够了。。。
总而言之，结果如何就看明天吧！哈哈！
穿上那红袍，代表着自己是时候成熟了，是时候学习面对自己所做的一切决定了。
在这里先祝贺自己 “恭喜我毕业了！”
嘻嘻 =)
October 9, 2012
SENIOR = JUNIOR???
Posted in Just Daily Life
What will you do? When there's someone more senior than you in your workplace but could not perform as a senior? When he is so lack of confidence to plan and decide things but keeps asking boss what to do and getting his instructions only...sighs...even with own colleagues he dont dare to plan and discuss freely but needs boss to call for an internal meeting...3pm inform me 5pm need to complete something when he has all the time he can to tell me...playing busy this few days and when the final submission date comes then start to panic...WHY???...One year working experience and still asking questions where even few months new staff can answer...6 buildings with around 20+ drawings and yet he only do one single drawing...my goodness...so many projects in the company and he does less than 5 drawings...throwing everything to draughtman...while he himself keeps checking email again and again reading emails again and again finding all the easy and light stuff to do...How to deal with this kind of senior? If I were to overpower him its somehow disrespectful...If I were to let it be and dont care so much he is going to drag down the company productivity and also mine...sighs...HOW? WHY? WHAT can I do??...
October 7, 2012
SATURDAY!
Posted in Just Daily Life
Today is Saturday...I started my day early around 7am to queue for my convocation attire collection...ended up taking 5 hours of my precious weekend...nite time out of nowhere me and my housemates decided to have nasi ayam penyet for dinner...then went off to Johor Premium Outlet bearing a mission to hunt for black coat...surprisingly I got lost and ended up at JUSCO Bukit Indah...lol...so we shopped there instead...and again out of nowhere we thought of having some little alcohol and chit chat back in our house...what a day indeed! now it's time to sleep... =)
October 2, 2012
钱来钱往
Posted in Just Daily Life
钱来了，转眼间，又走了。
已经只花费在必需品啊，为何还是这么紧戳呢。。。
接下来的几个月会好转吗？。。。
希望吧！。。。 =)
已经只花费在必需品啊，为何还是这么紧戳呢。。。
接下来的几个月会好转吗？。。。
希望吧！。。。 =)
October 1, 2012
终于开始安顿了。。。
Posted in Just Daily Life
感觉好久好久没写blog了。。。这两个月里都在忙工作，忙找房子，搬家，安顿，忙教会活动，等等。 现在终于算是标了个逗号，可以歇一会儿，回到自己的心里。
不知不觉工作也开始了两个月，慢慢的已经开始接管一些任务。 马来西亚的建筑业的确是称得上所谓的，马来西亚生活方式。 建筑业真的是我达到目标的领域吗？我真的可以从中脱颖而出吗？自己说话技巧不如人，搭关系技巧也不如人，我只是一个小人物，无高官背景，无富家支撑，无商业经验。 这一切一切都让我觉得自己只是在欺骗自己，为一个不可能的任务努力。
未来究竟会如何真的无法预测，很多事往往就在你不经意的当儿发生了。 很多机会也不经意地流失了。 亲情与感情是我以往一直坚守保护的。 现今我只想专注神的事工，事业与家庭。 感情真的可以在我身上出现吗？我不想再被伤害，所以不想再开始另一段感情，但未来我终须组织自己的家庭，现在不去珍惜机会，是否就会因此而失去了呢？
不知不觉工作也开始了两个月，慢慢的已经开始接管一些任务。 马来西亚的建筑业的确是称得上所谓的，马来西亚生活方式。 建筑业真的是我达到目标的领域吗？我真的可以从中脱颖而出吗？自己说话技巧不如人，搭关系技巧也不如人，我只是一个小人物，无高官背景，无富家支撑，无商业经验。 这一切一切都让我觉得自己只是在欺骗自己，为一个不可能的任务努力。
未来究竟会如何真的无法预测，很多事往往就在你不经意的当儿发生了。 很多机会也不经意地流失了。 亲情与感情是我以往一直坚守保护的。 现今我只想专注神的事工，事业与家庭。 感情真的可以在我身上出现吗？我不想再被伤害，所以不想再开始另一段感情，但未来我终须组织自己的家庭，现在不去珍惜机会，是否就会因此而失去了呢？
